The State of Kalamar Union is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by the Governor with an even hand, and notable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, frequent executions, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed population of 13.368 billion Kalamar Unionians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Welfare, Education, and Public Transport. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Capital Heights. The average income tax rate is 13.4%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Kalamar Unionian economy, worth 691 trillion betales a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 51,741 betales, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

Citizens are required to report any and all incidents of prayer to their local Religious Affairs Officer, vacationers and business travelers are often warned that they may lose the right to vote if they spend too much time overseas, wealthy pranksters dump refuse on unsuspecting citizens from up high, and farmers have taken to hunting billionaires who encroach on their land. Crime is well under control. Kalamar Union's national animal is the deer, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Kalamar Union is ranked 160,447^th in the world and 5^th in Crematorium for Most Patriotic, with 8.08 flags saluted per person per day.